What are your dreams? Your spouse? What a great capstone for the journey. Too often we grind it out. Just making it through day, what's on tap tomorrow, lock and load, here we go...
Dreams work better together. If you try to do it all alone, you might end up alone. You have a better chance of realizing a dream together. And it's more fun to have your best friend along to enjoy the journey.
There is a day 11, but it's more a reminder to keep building on these blocks from Days 11 to 11,000. Like reading the instructions on your shampoo bottle, same applies here; lather, rinse, repeat. Keep it going!
Best wishes to all who buy the book and thanks to Phil. Who had a dream of writing a book on how to help married couples and it became a reality in How to Turn Your Marriage Around in 10 Days.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Day 9; Needs
We all have needs. Like earlier post, life gets in the way. The neat thing about this book is by this point of the journey, you become more away of deeper things. I guess that's a summary point of why I enjoyed it so much. You are drawn in by the simplicity of a ten day journey, but Phil has a plan. As you step along the journey, you go from the shallow end of the pool into the deep end. Needs is like getting the guts to jump off the diving board. We both have needs. How can we work to meet those needs for each other?
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Day 7; Connection
Connect. It is what brought us together. Then life gets in the way.
I love the quote by Jeff Daly- Two monologues don't make a dialogue.
This was something I needed to hear. I have a Bachelor Degree in Communication though you'd never know it. I interrupt. Jump to conclusions without letting the other person finish.
What I needed to hear was the great info on the difference in how men and women process information;
Men tend to be literal,
Women naturally multi-task,
Women use more words...
These are near and dear to my wife's and my heart. I have needed to learn to see gray. Also, my wife can do two things at same time (listen to me and hammer away at PR release for Habitat for Humanity on PC). My wife also uses more words (back to that communication degree, if I think I got the point, but she's not done, learn to keep listening, as more often than once my first guess was wrong).
Phil's final advice is to pray together. This is a great section and is likely a change, it is for us, and not easy.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
I love the quote by Jeff Daly- Two monologues don't make a dialogue.
This was something I needed to hear. I have a Bachelor Degree in Communication though you'd never know it. I interrupt. Jump to conclusions without letting the other person finish.
What I needed to hear was the great info on the difference in how men and women process information;
Men tend to be literal,
Women naturally multi-task,
Women use more words...
These are near and dear to my wife's and my heart. I have needed to learn to see gray. Also, my wife can do two things at same time (listen to me and hammer away at PR release for Habitat for Humanity on PC). My wife also uses more words (back to that communication degree, if I think I got the point, but she's not done, learn to keep listening, as more often than once my first guess was wrong).
Phil's final advice is to pray together. This is a great section and is likely a change, it is for us, and not easy.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Day 6; Change
Only guarantees in life are death and taxes. Or as someone said on a sitcom, death in Texas (the character wasn't real bright).
I've learned professionally that change is inevitable. If you wait long enough, the joke goes, the initiative you haven't adopted will change to another. I have a file cabinet full of meeting notes sort of proving this point.
It isn't easy, but necessary to change. Phil though pointed out the key is overcoming past hurts. Wow, that's so true. We all come into relationships with past hurts. Baggage is a new term. Need to lighten our load will allow meaningful change.
If the word change bugs you, try other words;
adaptable,
flexible,
etc.
Whatever it takes, as Phil says, develop getting past your past.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
I've learned professionally that change is inevitable. If you wait long enough, the joke goes, the initiative you haven't adopted will change to another. I have a file cabinet full of meeting notes sort of proving this point.
It isn't easy, but necessary to change. Phil though pointed out the key is overcoming past hurts. Wow, that's so true. We all come into relationships with past hurts. Baggage is a new term. Need to lighten our load will allow meaningful change.
If the word change bugs you, try other words;
adaptable,
flexible,
etc.
Whatever it takes, as Phil says, develop getting past your past.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Day 5; Forgiveness
What a difficult topic for me. The easiest response is to hold a grudge. Forever if needed.In the chapter is a great observation, why is it easier to forgive strangers than those close to us?
Phil has excellent examples of couples, but he opens with an example so amazing, it is my personal template for forgiveness.
I've lived my whole life in southeastern Pennsylvania. The Anabaptist (Amish, Mennonite, Brethren etc.) and with age I've grown to admire their faith. The Amish community response after the Nickel Mine tragedy is the example.
What the world saw thanks to television was no pose for the community. In fact, they hate the attention and glare. This is how they live everyday. My late father was in a bad auto accident and the other driver was Anabaptist. They visited him in the hospital, asked what they could do to help. Never once did they worry about guilt or innocence. Glad he survived, what else can we do? This was so strange to us, almost hard to understand.
Forgiveness is powerful, not easy, but worth the work. I was glad to be reminded of the example set by my neighbors, and since I read chapter 5, as a horse drawn buggy slows my commute, I'm reminded of forgiveness. Not how late I'll arrive.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Phil has excellent examples of couples, but he opens with an example so amazing, it is my personal template for forgiveness.
I've lived my whole life in southeastern Pennsylvania. The Anabaptist (Amish, Mennonite, Brethren etc.) and with age I've grown to admire their faith. The Amish community response after the Nickel Mine tragedy is the example.
What the world saw thanks to television was no pose for the community. In fact, they hate the attention and glare. This is how they live everyday. My late father was in a bad auto accident and the other driver was Anabaptist. They visited him in the hospital, asked what they could do to help. Never once did they worry about guilt or innocence. Glad he survived, what else can we do? This was so strange to us, almost hard to understand.
Forgiveness is powerful, not easy, but worth the work. I was glad to be reminded of the example set by my neighbors, and since I read chapter 5, as a horse drawn buggy slows my commute, I'm reminded of forgiveness. Not how late I'll arrive.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Days 5 through 10...
My review stalled at day 4 of Phil Wagner book. Forgive me blogsphere, life became busy causing my adult ADD to neglect finishing my posts. Stay tuned and be well.
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Day 4, Trust
As a career retail banker, trust its been a key to my success. If a customer can't trust you, or your team, and in turn company, you have nothing to build a solid relationship.
When trust is broken, infidelity in marriage for instance, it's often the end. I have examples in my head of folks I've met over the years that on broke the trust, and the other couldn't forgive.
Phil points out that the first thing is admit error, ask for forgiveness and commit to do whatever it takes to earn back trust. "Honesty is the currency that buys it back over time."
Not immediate fix but over time. Another hard thing to grasp in our instant information and gratification world.
There is other excellent information, looking at the upbringing of each person and the impact of their role models on trust and what happens if it's broken. Gina and I joke that after our first fight as a married couple, we thought oh my, we need to get attorneys, it's over. Phil points out something we learned-- we aren't going anywhere, it's safe to talk. Then no one bottles up issues and heads for that river in Egypt- denial.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
When trust is broken, infidelity in marriage for instance, it's often the end. I have examples in my head of folks I've met over the years that on broke the trust, and the other couldn't forgive.
Phil points out that the first thing is admit error, ask for forgiveness and commit to do whatever it takes to earn back trust. "Honesty is the currency that buys it back over time."
Not immediate fix but over time. Another hard thing to grasp in our instant information and gratification world.
There is other excellent information, looking at the upbringing of each person and the impact of their role models on trust and what happens if it's broken. Gina and I joke that after our first fight as a married couple, we thought oh my, we need to get attorneys, it's over. Phil points out something we learned-- we aren't going anywhere, it's safe to talk. Then no one bottles up issues and heads for that river in Egypt- denial.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Day 3, Admiration
In our instant info world, Admiration is lost art. At best its fleeting.
Phil has a great concept of Admiration Ladder.
Top rung is Admiration, then Endorsement, Acceptance and bottom is Rejection.
He says most relationships are middle rung of Acceptance and sadly, neglect can lead down to rejection. His challenge is to move up two rungs to Admiration. Tools are offered to make this leap. Recognize and admire our differences. I think this is oft forgotten. Opposites attract as it allows a couple to be more than the individual alone. I'm an introvert, my wife an extrovert. Need to recognize, admire and celebrate each others uniqueness.
This chapter has a great section on the differences between men and women. I enjoyed examples of couples working through the ladder as they neared rejection and divorce. Overcoming examples from our past, learning and making a change for the better as well as example for next generation as children learn.
His challenge is on Day 3 get on rung of acceptance but don't stop there, work to move up to Admiration.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Phil has a great concept of Admiration Ladder.
Top rung is Admiration, then Endorsement, Acceptance and bottom is Rejection.
He says most relationships are middle rung of Acceptance and sadly, neglect can lead down to rejection. His challenge is to move up two rungs to Admiration. Tools are offered to make this leap. Recognize and admire our differences. I think this is oft forgotten. Opposites attract as it allows a couple to be more than the individual alone. I'm an introvert, my wife an extrovert. Need to recognize, admire and celebrate each others uniqueness.
This chapter has a great section on the differences between men and women. I enjoyed examples of couples working through the ladder as they neared rejection and divorce. Overcoming examples from our past, learning and making a change for the better as well as example for next generation as children learn.
His challenge is on Day 3 get on rung of acceptance but don't stop there, work to move up to Admiration.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Day 2, Honor
We have all heard, Honor thy father and mother.
How about honor your spouse?
It's part of the marriage vows too.
Thanks Phil, we all hear them at weddings, say them at ours, but how quickly we forget?
Our society is very self driven, and honoring person other than yourself does not come easy.
There are great tips and I'll end with this update to the grass is always greener.
"I would like to suggest a more positive spin: "The grass is always green where you water it."
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
How about honor your spouse?
It's part of the marriage vows too.
Thanks Phil, we all hear them at weddings, say them at ours, but how quickly we forget?
Our society is very self driven, and honoring person other than yourself does not come easy.
There are great tips and I'll end with this update to the grass is always greener.
"I would like to suggest a more positive spin: "The grass is always green where you water it."
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Monday, October 29, 2012
Day 1; Priorities
Philip challenges us to ponder our priorities for our marriage on Day 1. And being a Pennsylvania. Dutchman, born and raised, we are glass is half empty types. Half empty with a crack and what little is in there is leaking on the ground. I bring this up as Phil points out to Focus on the Positives to start.
This isn't a plea to put on rose colored glasses and pretend each is perfect. Think back to how you met, fell in love, and got married. It wasn't focusing on the speck in your spouses eye, ignoring the log in your own.
The challenge is to make your marriage a priority. With our fast paced lives, endless gadgets keeping us more connected in more ways, it's hard to prioritize. I'd like to close with a quote:
"It's time to fight for your marriage; not to fight with your spouse."
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
This isn't a plea to put on rose colored glasses and pretend each is perfect. Think back to how you met, fell in love, and got married. It wasn't focusing on the speck in your spouses eye, ignoring the log in your own.
The challenge is to make your marriage a priority. With our fast paced lives, endless gadgets keeping us more connected in more ways, it's hard to prioritize. I'd like to close with a quote:
"It's time to fight for your marriage; not to fight with your spouse."
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
How to turn around in 10 days
I was blessed to review a great new book from Phillip Wagner. One of the cool things about Twitter, is a person I follow from a church in Oklahoma is friends with Phil who's a pastor in LA.
So, turn around what in 10 days you ask? How to Turn Around Your Marriage in Ten Days.
It is a great approach for our fast paced 21st century lives. In ten days you get thought provoking and challenging ideas to go from ok to great.
Join me over the next 10 days as I share my thoughts.
Click here for Book Trailer
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
So, turn around what in 10 days you ask? How to Turn Around Your Marriage in Ten Days.
It is a great approach for our fast paced 21st century lives. In ten days you get thought provoking and challenging ideas to go from ok to great.
Join me over the next 10 days as I share my thoughts.
Click here for Book Trailer
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Day 8; Play
This was fascinating, play can lead us to learn our partners needs. Often as adults, we forget the learning and therapeutic value of play. I know I have. It's so easy to keep the schedule full, grab another gadget, check email, the news, etc.
Phil says it well, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, and Jack's marriage is in trouble.
It's easy to say we played when courting, can't let that evaporate.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Phil says it well, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, and Jack's marriage is in trouble.
It's easy to say we played when courting, can't let that evaporate.
@PhilipWagnerLA
www.philipwagner.com
Monday, September 17, 2012
Simply Jesus was simply awesome!
Enjoyed Joe Stowell book Simply Jesus. I found the key to help simplify with an eye to increasing joy of walk daily with Jesus.
Chapter 8 was a brilliant chapter on suffering in the world. How we can use suffering to relate to Jesus, walk towards him, not run away. The visual of Jesus praying in Gethsemane asking his father, why? We can do the same, kneel next to him and ask our heavenly father, why? Great examples of getting positives from negative experiences. From personal experience with 'toppers' (you think you have it bad? let me tell you my story) is to not see your troubles as a personal pity party. Instead, see it as way to build a personal relationship with God and his son Jesus, our savior.
I wrote this down, the Prayer of the Seeker, which was the powerful ending to a meaningful read:
Dear Lord, from the depths of my heart I ask for cleansing. Grant me the grace to keep self in its proper place, and to make my life simply about You. In the midst of all my routines, successes, and disappointments, help me to always rejoice in You and value You above any earthly prize. Meet me in temptation, and deliver me from evil. And if I should suffer, help me to pause to feel Your pain and love You more for the way You suffered for me. Jesus, I will live this day on bended knee by Your side in Gethsemane. What You ask I will do.
Than You for the promise that You will reward those who diligently seek You. I do seek You- with all my heart. I humbly ask that in Your good time and in Your way, You would satisfy my heart with the experience of Your presence.
In Your worthy name I pray. Amen.
More Info on Simply Jesus
About author Joe Stowell
I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.
Simply Jesus: Prayer of the Seeker
Had to jot this down, powerful end to an awesome read:
Dear Lord, from the depths of my heart I ask for cleansing. Grant me the grace to keep self in its proper place, and to make my life simply about You. In the midst of all my routines, successes, and disappointments, help me to always rejoice in You and value You above any earthly prize. Meet me in temptation, and deliver me from evil. And if I should suffer, help me to pause to feel Your pain and love You more for the way You suffered for me. Jesus, I will live this day on bended knee by Your side in Gethsemane. What You ask I will do.
Than You for the promise that You will reward those who diligently seek You. I do seek You- with all my heart. I humbly ask that in Your good time and in Your way, You would satisfy my heart with the experience of Your presence.
In Your worthy name I pray. Amen.
Dear Lord, from the depths of my heart I ask for cleansing. Grant me the grace to keep self in its proper place, and to make my life simply about You. In the midst of all my routines, successes, and disappointments, help me to always rejoice in You and value You above any earthly prize. Meet me in temptation, and deliver me from evil. And if I should suffer, help me to pause to feel Your pain and love You more for the way You suffered for me. Jesus, I will live this day on bended knee by Your side in Gethsemane. What You ask I will do.
Than You for the promise that You will reward those who diligently seek You. I do seek You- with all my heart. I humbly ask that in Your good time and in Your way, You would satisfy my heart with the experience of Your presence.
In Your worthy name I pray. Amen.
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Simply Jesus; Ch. 8
This is a brilliant chapter on suffering in the world.
How we can use suffering to relate to Jesus, walk towards him, not run away.
The visual of Jesus praying in Gethsemane asking his father, why? We can do the same, kneel next to him and ask our heavenly father, why?
Great examples of getting positives from negative experiences.
From personal experience with 'toppers' (you think you have it bad? let me tell you my story) is to not see your troubles as a personal pity party.
Instead, see it as way to build a personal relationship with God and his son Jesus, our savior.
How we can use suffering to relate to Jesus, walk towards him, not run away.
The visual of Jesus praying in Gethsemane asking his father, why? We can do the same, kneel next to him and ask our heavenly father, why?
Great examples of getting positives from negative experiences.
From personal experience with 'toppers' (you think you have it bad? let me tell you my story) is to not see your troubles as a personal pity party.
Instead, see it as way to build a personal relationship with God and his son Jesus, our savior.
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Simply Jesus
Enjoying Joe Stowell book Simply Jesus. Will post more when done, can definitely say its worthwhile. Help simplify and increase joy of walk daily with Jesus.
Turning the Page
Proud of #Nov & coach BoB today. Since Nov.'11, being on field and playing is step forward, #oneteam
Friday, July 20, 2012
Tragedy in Colorado
What a mess.
How'd this happen again?
All thoguhts I had after hearing news of the shooting in Aurora, Colorado.
Then I read Chapter 4 of If God is Good by Randy Alcorn. Click here to read. It put my mind at ease. I was reminded of the Amish community's response to the shooting at Nickel Mines School. I'm blessed that I grew up surrounded by Amish, Mennonite and Brethren neighbors. On my commutes, I pass schools similar to the one at Nickel Mine. After that tragedy, people were amazed at the response. Not hatred and looking for retribution. True to their Anabaptist roots, they practiced peace. Showing compassion to the shooter's family. This humble, genuine response was an awesome witness to the power of Jesus love and the depth of their faith.
Sunday morning I saw an interview with two survivors of the movie theater. They shared how they prayed during the shooting, were wounded but not killed, and sad for the loss of life. The one survivor shared he starts each day with a prayer thanking God for the gift of another day.
Mr. Alcorn says it much better than I can, but faith can overcome any challenge. Saying thanks is great advice for coping in any circumstance.
(Thanks to Chris at Multonomah "Blogging for Books" for sharing the link.)
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Sunday, January 15, 2012
"I know a way we can make you a warrior
Even though now you're a wuss
It's the way of the platypus!"
Phineas & Ferb
http://bit.ly/wgcuhU
Even though now you're a wuss
It's the way of the platypus!"
Phineas & Ferb
http://bit.ly/wgcuhU
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
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